Life Never Stops Surprising

...life never stops surprising; which is why, I always look up to each new dawn with excitement, as I don’t know what is in store for me in this life.

Life is strange; this very moment someone has died somewhere, while someone is born elsewhere. Each moment can become a moment to cherish or a moment that changes someone’s life forever. Life is incomplete if someone has never experienced the extremes of experiences our emotions can bring out.

Yesterday, an angel was born to one of my friends. My friend rushed his wife to hospital. When I reached the hospital, my friend told me about their baby girl. However, she was soon rushed to the neonatal care because of some complications. I sat down in front of the neonatal care, along with my friend. Just next to me, a gentleman was sitting who looked drowsy and tired. He seemed like he has become a father recently and must be tired due to the sleepless nights that every new parent has to undergo.

Just as I was sitting, waiting for any news from the neonatal care, my mind wondered into my world of thoughts. Life is a giant paradox; the more I try to understand, the more complex it becomes. Life and death – the cyclical forces of nature – appeared whimsical; it can create and destroy anyone without any decipherable pattern. The randomness was too perplexing to grasp.

Suddenly, I saw a ward boy pushing an oxygen cylinder into the neonatal care. I came out of my trance, alarmed at the sight of the oxygen cylinder as this could only mean one thing; a baby, who has just arrived into this world, is fighting for her life. I also realized that my friend and the gentleman next to me were both gone. My friend probably went to see his wife in the maternity ward. I was alone in front of the neonatal care, waiting for any news of his baby.

How wonderful it would be to become a father, I thought. That feeling of bringing someone to life must be a very strange yet blissful feeling. That would be the height of eros, I reckoned.

When I was immersed deep in these thoughts, the gentleman who was sitting next to me a while ago came back and started to chat with me. He told that his baby boy, who is just five days old, is suffering from pneumonia and is put in the neonatal care. Apparently, this gentleman has not slept for many days. I can make out from his worried face and worn out expressions.

In the midst of our conversation, I suddenly felt a deep, intense pain in my heart at the thought of what would I do, if something similar happens to my baby, when I’ll become a father.

I returned late at night from the hospital. Although, it was a day to rejoice for my friend who has become a father, but the thought of suffering kept me awake almost the whole night. Life is really peculiar. The fight between life and death will go on, irrespective of what my fears are. Because, life never stops surprising; which is why, I always look up to each new dawn with excitement, as I don’t know what is in store for me in this life. Finally, I could doze off, reassured – that life is full of surprises which makes it interesting – but well aware that it is also a series of antagonistic moments.

(I wrote this forgotten piece a few years back. I found it while going through my papers and diaries during the current 21 days India lock-down.)